Your Opinions Count

I want to thank all of you who chimed in on my last post about coexistence.  I have not visited or responded, because life has gotten the better of me.  Between looking for a job and starting a top secret venture, I have just not had the time.

I apologize to you all and want you to know that I read each and every word that you wrote to me.  I was so impressed with some of the responses, I am going to post a few of them here….

LMJ @ I’VE BEEN THINKING
I cannot be in a marriage where I cannot be part of some of “his things.” He tried that on me. I said, “fine. That’s how it’s gonna be? Well, then, when you are out doing your thing at 11 am every Saturday, sex will happen here at 11 am every Saturday with or without you! And that’s my own thing!

Daffy @ BATCRAP CRAZY
It takes two. That’s marriage – the merging of two lives. Why did he ask you to marry him if he didn’t want you to be a part of his life? Would he want the type of relationship the two of you have for his own children? Your children? Or would he want better?

Laura @ Heels, Hemlines & The Modern Mom
I guess I would ask him what he is scared of with you being a part of that life. What is he scared of at work? What are his concerns? Maybe is ex wife doesn’t want you around the kids because she doesn’t know you. Maybe you just tell him you are going to invite her for coffee so you can get to know each other.
I know it is hard to feel like he isn’t sharing his life with you.
He sounds like a good man, who maybe just doesn’t understand what sharing his life really means.

dionne @ Homesick Cajun
Also with his kids it’s totally different than it was with my ex’s kids. I’m Dad’s wife not “step mom!” Not that I want to take their Mom’s place, I’d just like for us to be closer.

Erin @ The Mother Load
I think you have definitely put yourself out there–you just want to be included and feel like you matter, like you are a part of his “other” life. I don’t think that is unrealistic; in fact, I think it’s necessary in order to have a proper marriage/partnership.

I hope that you two are able to find a middle ground, and soon. I don’t want this to slip through your fingers. I have met you both, and I can tell there is much untapped potential there. You have to trust each other. You have to give 110%. You have to be VULNERABLE to each other. You have to be willing to take risks, to go the road less traveled. You need to compromise. You need to hold hands.

Marriage is work. And it’s a garden that requires constant tending. If you neglect it, it will lie in ruins. If you wait too long, it will be too late. Carpe Diem—Sieze the Day. Grab each other, hold on tight, and promise that things will be different (and better) from this day forward.

SuziCate @ The Water Witch’s Daughter
I hope he opens his eyes and includes you in the other places in his life because marriage truly is the sharing of a life…where two become one so to speak.

Amy @ Good-Bye 20’s Hello Botox
Secrets only cause paranoia and frustration.
RR sounds like a great guy. He just needs to open up to you more in order to have a more balanced relationship with you.

Cara @ The Gone Again Smiths
I guess part of RR’s issue may be out of habit. If he and his ex lived in coexistence than he never had to share what he was doing (and if that is part of his explanation you might point out how well that worked).

These are just a sampling of the wonderful comments. I am posting them in hopes that they will help others as well. Thank you all and love you!

Bloggesses and Bloggasses

I am appealing to all of you Bloggesses and Bloggasses out there. And, yes, I made up those words…I like em! SHUT UP! Okay…before you go WTF, let me explain what they mean…

Bloggess is a Blogging Goddess
Bloggass is a Blogging God..get it…BLOG GASS…or BLOGG ASS…either way, it fits..hehe

See, good wholesome things.  I can be wholesome..CAN TOO!   Here’s what I need…three things…no, four things. Sorry, I just thought of one more.

First, I have that little button up on top there that says “Best Of“. If you click on that button, you note it is an empty page. I need my lovely Blogesses and Blogasses to tell me your favorite posts that should go on that page. I will post them all and of course give credit with a linky by who recommended them.

Second, I am rocking it out at 476 followers. I would LOVE to make it up to 500. So, any and all peeps you all send my way is very much appreciated. I need to point out that Erin the Muthah at The Mother Load has sent me a TON of you and for that Erin, I LOVE LOVE LOVE you…okay, that’s not the only reason, she gives great sex and despite the turrets, it is kind of a turn on when she is screaming cock in the midst of nookie.  And if you don’t follow her, YOU MUST!!

I believe in paying it forward in bloggyland, and will in turn, if your peeps let me know who sent them, do a whole post once I hit that 500 with your names and links. AND, I will even give away some fabulous personalized Lah Dee Dah soap to my number 500!! Click on the Our Soaps if you don’t have a clue as to what I am yammering on about!

Third, VOTE for the best Lah Dee Dah Soap Commercial. Voting ends on January 31, and you can vote as many times as you want. Tweet it, twat it, facebook it, just get your peeps over to vote!! A Visa gift card is on the line for the winner, and seriously, they are all fantabulous commercials!

Fourth, I want to start a commenting revolution for all of the Comment Crack Whores out there!! Grab my button, display it loud and proud, and when you see it on someone’s blog, leave them some love!! Oh, and if all of you would comment on just one tiny post, I can die happy.

The Queen thanks you and is outties!